However, there is definitely a positive side to feeling overwhelmed-it has shown me over and again how much I need Jesus' wisdom, strength, and sustaining power. As my own sin is revealed through this straining process (read: I've complained every now and then!), I am reminded forcefully of how that sin would completely separate me from a good and holy God were it not for the fact that Jesus is my rescuer. When I've felt completely exhausted physically and mentally it has driven me to the word for strength to go on, and there I've seen His
majesty (Isaiah 45),
compassion (Matthew 20:34),
power (Mark 4:41),
meekness (Matthew 11:28)
wisdom (Colossians 2:3),
love (John 15:13),
forgiveness (Luke 23:34),
holy zeal (Matthew 21:13),
victory over death (Luke 24:6)
and more...oh much, much more. The more I learn about Him, the more I know I have to learn-and it's been amazing to realize more and more that He wants me to know Him more-that when I seek Him, He draws near to me and teaches me (James 4:8a). I risk rambling, but I sum up my vent about school with a couple quotes that have reminded me how precious it is to know Jesus.
In Him is freedom from condemnation,
Fullness in His righteousness,
Eternal vitality in His given life,
Indissoluble union in fellowship with Him;
In Him I have all that I can hold;
Enlarge me to take in more."
~ Valley of Vision, The Life Look, pg. 97
"I dare not say but my Lord Jesus hath fully recompensed my sadness with His joys my losses with His own presence. I find it a sweet and rich thing to exchange my sorrows with Christ's joys, my afflictions with that sweet peace I have with Himself."
~Samuel Rutherford, The Loveliness of Christ, pg. 48